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Someone please bitch slap me upside the head

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Remember a week ago, when I was a happy go lucky “I just heard my baby’s heartbeat” sort of girl? How is it that in a span of a week, I have gone and withered into a bawling mess again? My symptoms are disappearing… my boobs aren’t as sore….I’m not cramping as much…I just don’t FEEL pregnant… DAMN ME! Why can’t I just be relaxed and happy??? What the fuck is wrong with me?? Of course it doesn’t help that every mother loving website I go on has some sort of link to Kate Middleton’s pregnancy and “possible due date” which is pretty much my exact due date as well…except Kate fucking Middleton is spewing her 87 pound ass off in the hospital, and here I am, feeling nothing. Except tired. But I have no idea if that’s pregnancy related, progesterone suppository related, or just “I’m done with this fucking week” related. I’m almost 9 WEEKS PREGNANT. Shouldn’t I be feeling…more?

To make things even “better”, I had a really bad second interview today for the job I’ve put probably 20 man hours into trying to get. This was my final interview, and I think I blew it. The guy was super awkward at the end of the interview, and got up to leave without even letting me know next steps for decision making on the position.  I cried in the car ride back to the office, and our stupid parking attendant caught me crying when I pulled in.

Sorry, I’m just going to use this post as a rant. Please feel free to bitch slap me upside the head.

Also, I’m ticked “poo”nk that y’all liked my most mortifying poo story ever. Makes me happy.



About Sunny

I'm a happily married, 31 year old gal who is just starting her journey to conceive. I also have ovaries that may need a jump start. This blog is an attempt to channel my obsessive research on my Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome into something a pregnancy test. That would be awesome. I also hope that other women with this condition will find support in this blog. There are a lot of us out here! Happy reading, whatever your journey may be.

12 responses »

  1. If it helps calm your fears at all, my boobs were only sore for a few weeks and then felt fine. I never did have much nausea. The only persistent symptom I’ve had is exhaustion (even off progesterone). The cramping will come and go; sometimes your uterus will be expanding and adjusting and sometimes it just seems to take a break.

  2. I’d try to reassure you, but I’m still laughing too hard at that poo story.

    Srsly, though — eff that job! If they don’t like you, they’re idiots, which means if you DID get the job, you’d be stuck working with idiots, which means it’s not worth getting too upset over. Do you have mat leave at your current job? Maybe it’s better to just stick it out, use the mat leave, then quit and enjoy some extra time off when you have the bagel…?

  3. Because infertility makes pregnancy a total shitty mind game. I totally get it.

  4. Suck! I’m sorry the interview didn’t go as well as you hoped, but I do hope that all your fears are for nothing in regards to both Bagel and job.

  5. I’m sorry on both counts as well. Even though we will all tell you that what you are experiencing is normal, it is also completely normal (for our kind anyway) to be bat shit crazy worried about all of it. Do you see your doc soon?

  6. My only pregnancy symptom was fatigue. My boobs didn’t hurt at all, no nausea, just tired.

  7. Grr. Pressed enter after one letter because I am an idiot.

    I had an interview like that and I got the job. The guy was just in a hurry to get to a meeting and was awkward. So who knows what will happen on that end?


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