I don’t talk much about the good ole sex life here on the blog, but since being pregnant, I’ve noticed some changes in the bedroom department, and thought I’d ruminate on them for a bit in this forum. If up close sexy talk from a real life pregnant woman makes you squirm…well…don’t worry. I won’t tell anyone about your secret stash of bondage porn. ANYWAY. I digress.
I’ve always felt pretty confident sexually. As someone who falls somewhere between freaky nympho and prudish 50s housewife, I have always felt my sexual appetite to be healthy, adventurous, and fairly uninhibited. I go with the flow, and don’t judge it if you like a finger here or there. Hubs is the same way, and sexually, we’re quite the good match. When Hubs and I were trying to baby make, there would be weeks when we would have sex 4 or 5 times, which is a lot for me. Frankly, some of those times would be a chore, but in the end, the child we produced the night I went out, got hammered, saw Book of Mormon and had a rollicking sack session with him was well worth the other un-sexy sexy times we had where we would literally force ourselves to do it after a fight about rinsing dishes before you put them in the dishwasher (ALWAYS rinse that shit FIRST!).
When not pressured to baby make, I’m usually a 2–maybe 3–times a week girl on a good week. No less than once a week on a bad week. This has all changed now that I’m pregnant. I noticed my libido waning a bit in my first trimester. We were still getting it on maybe 2 times a week, but I wasn’t up to my normal friskiness. I didn’t have any morning sickness or fatigue, so I had no real excuse aside from “just not feeling it”. According to the internet, now that I’m in my second tri, many women experience this surge of sexual energy and want to bang 24/7. Looking at my bowling ball stomach and newly budded thigh and ass fat, I want to meet these mythical women and see what their sexy secrets are! I’m finding myself on the opposite end of the spectrum, and it’s frustrating. Not only does it take me longer to get in the mood, I am always aware of the way my stomach feels, and that there is a human being in there. When I do finally get a bit revved up and get outside my head, Hubs will say something like, “Are you sure this won’t hurt Bagel?” and I’m like, “Fuck Bagel. Fuck ME.” Which is always good for erections.
Aside from the body feeling strangely not mine anymore, I’m running into issues–um–finishing. See–I’ve never been able to have an orgasm any way other than missionary or oral. I know, I know…I’m a bit vanilla when it comes to that. But damnit! I know what I like, and I know what works. With a large and in charge stomach in the way, not to mention, fear of Hubs flopping his body weight on to our fragile fetus, missionary has been out. Oral with my huge belly is awkward as well. All you “women on top” girls, oh, how I envy you. I have tried every which way and the other to get myself off that way, and it’s just. not. happening. Same thing with every version of cowboy, cowgirl, doggy, and lazy dolphin (ok…I have no idea what lazy dolphin is, but it sounds interesting).
Last night was the first night in a couple of weeks that Hubs and I had penetrative sex (we’ve done “other things” between that time, but definitely not that frequently). Although I, again, couldn’t get off on top, I must admit, it was really nice just being with him in that way. Sex is vital to our marriage, and I don’t want to let it slip…I do miss my libido, though, even if it wasn’t ever at a porn star level…and I never thought I’d type this…but I miss missionary position!