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Mother’s Little Helper

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Forget Percocet, Vicodin, and Xanax…

Hand over the Phillips Cherry Flavored milk of magnesia!!

Holy shit guys, how did I go 9 months without knowing about this stuff? I saw the doctor yesterday for my 39 week check up and explained to him that along with sharp shooting pains through my rectum (which he says are totally normal) my ass feels like it’s being cheese grated by shards of glass every time I poop. He recommended I take milk of magnesia (MOM) because it’s a bit gentler on the system than some of the other over the counter laxatives. I went to Rite Aid, picked that up along with some Cortizone 10 1% for my itching vag (I’m a ball full of sexy these days), and took the MOM last night. This morning, my poo was glorious. I mean, GLORIOUS. No pain, no blood, no sweating, no screaming and grunting as if I were in labor…I nearly teared up and thanked the Academy after that one. As if that weren’t enough, the Cortizone cream has my vag feeling zesty and menthol–no itch! I still don’t know exactly what the prob is, but the doc did a swab for a yeast infection so we’ll see what’s up. For now, I’m basking in the glow of what $10 of over the counter drugs can do.

The update on the Royal Bagel watch is that she is still at a -2 station, but I am now 1cm dilated, 25% effaced, and my cervix is very soft and anterior. we’re making some progress, people! Doc is still guessing I’ll over extend my due date (this Sunday) by a bit, but it made me feel good to hear that my body is actually warming up for the big event.

Bagel seems like she is ready to bust out, but I will leave it to her as to what day she picks. For now, I’m just savoring the awesome feeling of not being constipated for the first time in months. YAY!!!



About Sunny

I'm a happily married, 31 year old gal who is just starting her journey to conceive. I also have ovaries that may need a jump start. This blog is an attempt to channel my obsessive research on my Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome into something a pregnancy test. That would be awesome. I also hope that other women with this condition will find support in this blog. There are a lot of us out here! Happy reading, whatever your journey may be.

13 responses »

  1. Congrats on the pooping! I know how utterly terrible it is to not be able to go, or to go and want to scream from pain. Blerg!
    Also, yay for being so close!! Sleep as much as you can right now. You will miss it soon. 😉

  2. Oooh why did I not know the magic pooping quality of mom! I feel I missed a post retrieval trick, so glad you found poop relief and that you’re progressing!! Eeeeep exciting!

  3. Funny story for your eyes only (and whoever reads your comments) that I haven’t put on my blog. At least I don’t think I have.

    Anyway, the first poo at home after giving birth (not the first one, just the first home one) was the product of 3 days of hospital food, basically an entree sized salad and sandwich at every meal along with fruit, chocolate cake, chocolate milk and cappuccino. Breastfeeding makes one sooo hungry! Anyway, it all went in and it all came out in what can only be described as a gigantic black dildo. Seriously, the biggest poo I’ve ever pooed. And my hubby, bless him, had to figure out a way to get it down the toilet since I had to go take care of the baby.

    That is true love. I can’t believe you’re almost done! I can’t wait to read your birth story!

    • Holy shit. That may be the best story ever. I won’t let Hubs within 10 feet of the bathroom when I’m pooping. Let alone seeing it! You are a warrior!

  4. We had the same exact due date! You made me laugh so hard in this post… Hysterical!

  5. Woohoo!! I will totally have to remember this MOM stuff later on in my pregnancy… any zesty vagizza sounds like a lot of fun, actually — maybe it could lead to sexy time, after all? 😉

  6. Glad you found some relief. EEEK we are getting so close!

  7. Your poo stories are the best! Thank you! Good luck on the baby’s birth.


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