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Fertile Franny Had her baby

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Facebook alert! Facebook Alert! Come one, come all! Fertile Franny (who got really uncomfortable about hearing how hard it is for me to get pregnant and totally saw me crying at dinner) has had her second child! Huzzah!

What this means:

1. Fertile Franny has only had sex twice (since this is exactly how many times she needed to have sex to conceive two children).

2. I need a Facebook Fast. For realsie.

I’ve read about many bloggers taking a Facebook “time out” because, well, shit. Facebook is a really depressing place for an IF-er. This week, I have been hit with no less than 2 ultrasound pics, one pregnancy announcement, and three “hello world! I’m a newborn!” posts where I’m confronted with mishapen-head- from-birth-canal alien pics.

Sorry kid. I’m sure you’ll be really cute one day, but not now, and please… not while I’m eating.

See? I’m getting bitter and jaded. I’m getting sad and frustrated that I can’t magically pop a misshapen head kid from my nether regions and groan like an earth mother lioness while doing so. I envy these moms who can do this. My little sister is one of those moms I can’t stand it now…on Facebook, she complains about her son’s sleeping patterns, and how sore her boobs are. I’m on a slow burn that she got pregnant on her first try. I can’t tell her this. I can’t tell her that all of her Facebook posts bitching about how my nephew “just won’t nap” enrage me.

Seriously? Is this your biggest problem? Blow me.

Yes, a Facebook Fast is in order. I have to stop pissing myself off by looking at everyone else’s happy families.  7 Days, and we’ll see if I can’t do more! I will start first thing tomorrow.

 

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Single Girls and Their Married Facebook Friends

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This week has been a doozy for updating the blog…it’s so busy at work, and I’ve been sort of down in the dumps lately about not getting that job. I don’t take rejection well.  Not to mention my MIL was here for a full on week, and I am just now coming down from the intensity of all of that.

Daydreaming in Progress just did a great post about Facebook status updates today. In one part of the post, she goes into the different stages of our lives that show up on our Facebook feeds. A few years ago, I was getting a ton of wedding pictures on my feed, and now, it’s all about baby announcements on my feed. It’s gotten to the point where a new baby photo, ultrasound pic, or pregnancy announcement appears on my Facebook feed at least once a day.That definitely wasn’t the case 5 years ago!

However, it got me thinking: Just like many others before me, I’ve posted some of my wedding pics on Facebook. Is this the same slap in the face to my single friends as looking at ultrasound photos feels like to me? I got hit with a dose of perspective today. Not to say that I won’t still have a twang of hurt when I see the baby pics on Facebook…but it’s interesting to think that our talk of our husbands, our marriages, our engagements, or a status update on a beautiful wedding could make a single person feel sad, too.

Food for thought.

Happy Leap Year.

 

 

Facebook “Blow Out”

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What’s better than having a friend who got his wife pregnant after 2 months of “trying”?

Oh yeah! I know!

Reading his Facebook status updates where he and a bunch of other fertile parents like to sit and laugh about baby feces and what their childless friends must be thinking!

In Fertile Speak, a “blow out” isn’t something you get at a salon…I guess it’s a cutsie way of saying that his kid’s shit exploded out of her diaper.

Awwwww! Cute!!!!!!!

To my fertile friend: Yes, I have blocked your fertile feed from showing up from now on. This isn’t your first offense at a status update like this. What I’m “thinking”  is that you clearly have no effing CLUE that many of your childless friends would love to have a baby that shits all over the place.

To Andrea: Ahahahaaa! Birth control pills! I get it! It’s so FUNNY being childless! After reading this post on how awful baby poo is, all us wacky childless folks want to do is pop birth control pills so we don’t get pregnant!! AHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAA!

Fuck you.

When I sit down and think about all of the medical expenses the ALI community “invests” in, and all of the heartache this causes, I get so damn mad at posts like these.